I organised the defence of this city while you held court in the ruins of Harrenhal. I led the foray when the enemies were at the gate while your grandson, the King, quivered in fear behind the walls. I bled in the mud for our family. And as my reward I was trundled off to some dark little cell.
this is ten percent luck, twenty percent skill
fifteen percent concentrated power of will
five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain
and a hundred percent reason to remember the name.
Lannister Happy Endings: AU in which all Lannisters are getting along great. Saturdaynight is family night and they all drink expensive Dornish wine and play games. Of course everyone cheats. Tyrion is the only one who bothers to read the instructions. Cersei is suspicious everyone is plotting against her. Jaime had no idea what he’s doing and just trolls the entire game. Myrcella outsmarts Tywin and Tommen just falls asleep dreaming about kittens. AND THEY ALL LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER.
Game of Thrones meme: five houses » House Lannister. [3/5]
In a coat of gold, or a coat of red, a lion still has claws.
game of thrones meme: four deaths [2/4]
↳ Tywin Lannister
<…> “One simple question, you owe me that much.”
“I owe you nothing.”
“You’ve given me less than that, all my life, but you’ll give me this. What did you do with Tysha?”
He does not even remember her name. “The girl I married.”
“Oh, yes. Your first whore.”
Tyrion took aim at his father’s chest. “The next time you say that word, I’ll kill you.”
“You do not have the courage.”
“Shall we find out? It’s a short word, and it seems to come so easily to your lips.”
<…> Tyrion’s finger clenched. The crossbow whanged just as Lord Tywin started to rise. The bolt slammed into him above the groin and he sat back down with a grunt. The quarrel had sunk deep, right to the fletching. Blood seeped out around the shaft, dripping down into his pubic hair and over his bare thighs. “You shot me,” he said incredulously, his eyes glassy with shock.
“You always were quick to grasp a situation, my lord,” Tyrion said. “That must be why you’re the Hand of the King.”
“You … you are no … no son of mine.”
“Now that’s where you’re wrong, Father. Why, I believe I’m you writ small. Do me a kindness now, and die quickly. I have a ship to catch.”
For once, his father did what Tyrion asked him. The proof was the sudden stench, as his bowels loosened in the moment of death. Well, he was in the right place for it, Tyrion thought. But the stink that filled the privy gave ample evidence that the oft-repeated jape about his father was just another lie.
Lord Tywin Lannister did not, in the end, shit gold.